Sincerity

It comes down to sincerity.  Everything comes down to sincerity.  When you are talking to someone or increasingly these days typing to them you have to know when people are being sincere.  And this is a problem if, for example, you can't read people's body language.  As followers know, I have Asperger's Syndrome, also know as Autism Spectrum Disorder and one of the side effects is that you have difficulty reading people and their body language.  It should be noted that if you can't read body language, you are not very good at speaking with it too.  So for me, I find it easier to just tell the truth in all cases.  If you are not speaking a lie and no one catches you in a lie ever and you are honest to a fault about yourself, people will trust you at your word.  

I can't read sarcasm, which causes many problems because I can't tell if someone is agreeing with me when they say the opposite thing.  I try to be sarcastic but often don't know if I am doing it right.  When I expect sarcasm I can read it, when I don't I can't.  

My own mother, whom views mental illness very negatively and so won't accept I have Autism — not an unheard of response, thinks I am rude because sometimes I speak in a patronizing voice.  Which I have no control over.  I don't know that I am doing it.  People who know me, no that I don't mean it as such.  Some even think it is funny, because it is like sarcasm, because I am trying to be sincere.  

You see being sincere allows you to talk to people and let them know you care.  It is great to let people know that you are sorry about something, really sorry and not just going through the motions.  Reading sincerity is also important because it lets you know that you are forgiven, or in the very least that your apology is accepted.  If you can't read people, and you are sincerely apologizing, you might not see that your apology has been accepted and you might put yourself in the doghouse on your own.  

Apologizing over the Internet and messenger type systems, can also be tough, because the person is not present in person to read and typed messages are by their nature impersonal.  The desire for sincerity in these media can push people to go overboard.  Can you go too far?

My strategy is to apologize and then let them decide when they wish to reestablish contact.  Often your transgression was done through the media that you apologized over so your sin and you recompense are staring your victim in the face every time