It is the game that all children want to play. It the game that all adults play, often to prove they are adults, they play The Game. The people who tell people they are not playing The Game are either tired of it or are just playing another strategy of The Game.
I like to roleplay. I like to play Settlers of Catan. I like to play most games and I am good at most of them especially if they involve a little bit of thinking and a little less chance. Games of chance I am horrible with. But The Game is not any game like that; it involves social skills, so I am terrible playing this game. This game involves only two people, well usually. I am beginning to think that there are different objectives for different people and different sexes. I think women play the game differently than men and young people play it differently than older people; I do not play it well and usually not at all.
The Game is the game that men and women play together.
Most guys think the object is to get the girl to have sex with him. Most girls, I am not sure what girls are playing the game for but I think they play it for security. Financial security, emotional support and a life partner. I think, it is hard to tell because I have been such a bad player of the game usually failing the first gambit. I think young women also play the game for sex and when they play it for that goal, they have a distinct advantage and are able to pick an choose.
The reason why I am a bad player is because I played the game with the wrong objective for my age group. When women were looking for sex I was looking for a life partner and when they were looking for a life partner I was looking for sex. Actually, I don't think I have ever been really looking for sex, except when I think that is what the other person is looking for. I have been looking for a complimentary body, someone to talk with and be around. And sex too, because I have been learning that couples that don't have sex or intimacy stop seeking it and fall into friendship. Friendship is good, but it is limited.
Friendship is great, don't get me wrong. With the right friend you can climb mountains and defeat adversity, battling against the odds to win out. But friendship lacks something. Sex unlocks it. That is, to be specific, sex with a committed friendship level relationship unlocks it. Sex forms this attachment bond that when exists with friendship, can push the friendship further. Like climbing mountains defeating adversity battling agains all odds to win out, possibly sacrificing something to do it.
I have found that to play the game, it is important to be good looking. Culturally acceptable beauty means that you can achieve your goal more often than not. Cultural unacceptable beauty means you fail more often than you do and you have to rely on other means. Social charm is the second most important helper in the game, it can be learned, but it is social and introverts are at a distinct disadvantage here, if you don't understand sociableness, you had better fake it; I fake it all the time, try to. Wit and humor are also good but they are down the chain quite a ways. Before someone can see you as witty or funny, they have to talk to you and often that won't happen if you are a failure in the first two areas. Then humor is particular to different people and no humor is truly universal.
So if I play The Game, I am typically looking for someone that I can be with, share my life and be my witness. I am looking for a friends that I can talk deep into the night with and lose track of time with. I am looking for someone I can take care of and be taken care of. I am looking for someone who inspires thought in me every day. Someone who I can make love to, knowing that the conversation we had just tabled will be opened up when we are finished. Someone who finishes my thoughts as I start any sentence.
I am looking for a lot, but I am not looking for everything, just the core. I thought I found it, but it was not there, just friendship. It will take me sometime to really marshal up the energy to try again. And there is no one around here that could come close to her.
I guess my goals are the same as most women, but most women I get the feeling do not know what they want. It is rare to find all that in a culturally acceptably beautiful man if all they want is sex. Same said for the socially gifted charmer, they are both looking to score and have gotten used to scoring. Sure they are out there, they do exist, but they are rare. When they get older they might be looking for something else . . ..
Right now, I think, I will just stop looking. I am tired and I hate losing.
People who win The Game, get to stop playing The Game. They get to bask in the rewards and have children if they wish, they can get married, or not. They can have sex or not, but they do not have to play The Game ever again if they wish it. But everyone who does not win is destined to play the game again and a gain until they die or they win, because just refusing to play The Game, is still playing The Game.
No comments:
Post a Comment