So I was biking down the street a couple of months ago with BicycleGirl, a little scheduled ride that I was the only one to show up to. I need to ride in a group otherwise I can't just go for a ride; there always has to be a destination. So we were riding and she was chatting with me. She told me that she had heard that there was an attack on the bicycle path that we were riding on and I told her that I knew that, I said, two in fact. I related two her that I was disgusted that the police were withholding that information from the people so they could let the attacker think that they were not on to him. I heard that the attacker jumped women in a desolate part of the trail and assaulted them. In Boonieland when a man jumps a woman it is not an assault, but rape. I went on to say that that sort of thing should have gone out with the lawsuit Jane Doe vs. Big Smoke Police force. When the police did not warn people that there was a serial rapist on the loose.
BicycleGirl had not heard of either assaults. That conversation lead to a her telling me about a television commercial, a baby shower, where the mother unwraps presents for her new baby girl. One present contains a rape whistle, questioned by the new mom, the guest replies that she will need it one day.
Heavy words on a nice warm Friday afternoon. On the way back she asks me The Question. You know the question that every girl in a relationship asks a single guy, What kind of girl do you like?
My answer was quick and not well thought out, I said the first thing that came to my mind. I like Brown Girls. It was truthful, but not fully truthful. It was quick and closed the subject fast and it shut down follow up questions. There are no Brown Girls in Smallville. There are no Single Brown Girls in Smallville; they all arrive married and unavailable.
The truth is I like Brown Girls, but I also like white girls, Asian girls, tall girls, short girls, girlie girls, tomboy girls; I like girls. But I also know that I can't talk to girls. And it is not that I like them, they appeal to me, I am interested in them, but they are all strangers to me, and I can't talk to them. And I am really only attracted to women that I know. The better that I know them, the stronger the attraction. So I ended the conversation with that I only liked brown girls.
I have been trying to keep the sex talk, the sexual obsession out of the bicycle arena, because I like bicycling so I did not want to ruin it. I kept it out of Yoga. I try to keep it out of everything that I enjoy so there are not complications. I have been thinking that what that thinking has done is help make sure that I remain single, then again I don't think there are any single women in the bicycle group. I can't tell if the question was meant to find out about me or to find out why I was single. Maybe playing it safe was the rig thing to do, from a person who can't tell if they are getting their best friend angry or not.
Here is what I know about me. The better that I get to know someone the more interested I become in them, unless they are in committed relationships, I begin to feel amorous. I am not good with people close to my own age, so I tend to be attracted to people who are older or younger than myself. Almost everyone in Smallville twenty years younger than me and older are in longterm relationships, so I find myself strongly attracted to women much younger than I am.
But Smallville is not the Big Smoke, people gossip, people will censure you on the street, people will tell your parents. Essentially there is a shame factor. Oh people will tell you that you are amoral.
Here in Smallville in Boonieland, where sexual assault is still in the closet, it is considered amoral to be in a consensual relationship with someone twenty years younger than oneself. It is simpler and less complicated to say, I am single because I like Brown Women.
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