There is only two sexes, male and female identified by their reproductive role and/or their sex chromosomes. There are other sexes, but they are variations on the those two, like hermaphrodites and such, but effectively only two.
Gender, however, is not the same as sex. While sex is arguably specific, gender is a spectrum, a range between two points, Heterosexual and Homosexual. Gender is two aspects, both of them also spectrums, self identification and sexual preference.
Self Identification: is how a person feels about themselves as to their own true sex. There are some interesting sex differences between the social stigma of the sexes on this point. Masculine females suffer minor derision from within the majority of the sex, called tomboys because they prefer to things society views as male. But it is feminine males that suffer the most censure. A girl that is interested in football growing up has some casche value and can move between the male and female spheres of influence, but not so for males who have interest in feminine ideals. A boy who wishes to play with dolls or even play girl's games is openning themselves up to bullying and genuine beatings. Society's message is that it is acceptable, but not encouraged, for a girl and later a woman to prefer a male lifestyle; the range of epitaphs range from "cool" to "butch" and rarely "dyke". For boys and later men, society's message is almost always negative, skipping the positive and neutral tags, to jump right into the homosexual slurs.
And this is why men are all fucked up. Women, their self identification is an acceptable spectrum, but for men only being male is acceptable; if a man cannot stick to the one point and fits more on the spectrum he is made to feel female. Men fit on a scrum too. I am self identified as firmly on the spectrum. I like some things male and some things female, according to my society. Truth be known, I think I am mostly female identified.
The other spectrum is Sexual Preference: basically which sex do you prefer to be with sexually. Luckily in Canada, this is not as big as it used to be and it is certainly better than many counties. The range is between of preference is between preferring men sexually and preferring women sexually. Most people are heterosexual, of either sex and more males are homosexual than women but more women are bisexual than men. Men tend to be polar, again, while women are also more of a spectrum. I am in touch with myself; I know I am on a spectrum. I am heterosexual, but some men interest me, but they are rare.
There is another spectrum, but it does not enter into gender; it is Sexual-ness. The spectrum is between asexuality and sexual. It is a spectrum having to do with 'how often' they want sex, and men are typically on the often side but all people tend to be towards the center.
The problem with Gender comes mostly from Men, because they are socialized to be polarized and not on a spectrum. Men who feel feminine in some way self identified, feel not Male, as being a man is a whole bunch of things, but all in extreme. A man who is not an extreme example of maleness can be made to felt as female. And there is nothing wrong with this. But if you cannot accept being a spectrum, you can stop feeling like a man. A man can identify as a female and still like women. The way that many people feel that they can resolve this conflict of Manhood, is to switch their sex. I think this is fine, but only if they feel they must, and specifically can't accept that they are on a spectrum. But I would hope that they are at least homosexual or bisexual, because another thing I have learned from MagicEyes, is that nothing ruffles homosexual women like a man that alters his sex and becomes a lesbian. it feels like they changed their sex to be a lesbian. But someone like me, a feminine male who likes women strongly, would still be a feminine person who likes women, even if I changed my sex; I would have to be a lesbian.
You see sex and gender is not actually linked; they are seperate aspects of people. It is just assumed to be linked and for men strongly linked, but just because our culture tells us convincingly that gender and sex are interchangeable does not make it so.
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